On Thursday, April 20th at 8:45pm, Friedhoff Hall was home to arguably the classiest school sanctioned event. As is tradition, this E-Days saw a fresh round of faces at Mr. Big Digger, the most masculine beauty pageant to ever grace this earth. CSM’s Sigma Kappa put together this event, featuring their sorority presidents and past presidents as judges, with guest judge Dr. Vincent Kuo.
The evening consisted of three portions: swim wear, talent, and formal wear. Contestants included: Charlie Becquet, Cade Canon (“Mr. Naughty”), Hayden Wuthrich (“Mr. Nice”), Bradley Huffman (“Mr. Claus”), Nik Geschwentner (“Mr. Mrs. Claus”), Ben Topper (“Mr. Ten Bopper”), Thomas Wagener (“Mr. Wags”), Josiah Thomas (“Mr. Hahnchsom”), Paul Winckler (“Mr. Bean”), Bryce Wilcox (“Mr. Hank E. Panky”), Aaron Sanders, Jake Pinkston (“Mr. Gold Digger”), Ian Miller, Sam Riddle, Ian Tobiason, Pooya Aghanoury, Walker Hayse, Brandon Weihl, and Mitchell Hopper (“Mr. Clicker Points”).
Some notable talents included: strip bubble-blowing, a multimedia experience about dogs, twerking in American flag underwear, and pretend skiing. Standard attire consisted of rip-away pants, size-too-small Speedos, cosmetics abs, ill-fitting suits, and lots of skin. Dr. Kuo left with a giant souvenir black-and-white portrait of himself.
After much deliberation, the judges crowned Paul Winkler as Mr. Big Digger 2017. He was presented with a gold-plated crown (complete with T-Rex hood ornament) and a bouquet of flowers. Next year, we hope to see a larger seating section for all the adoring fans.