As the weather gets colder and the daylight gets shorter, life can become quite desperate for even the best of us. So for a student like Alex Hansen, the dropping temperatures could signal the end at any time, making future interviews nigh impossible to conduct. Thanks to the surplus of Oredigger newspapers around campus, however, this MME junior was able to stick it out on the park bench long enough to be immortalized in Geek of the Week lore.
[Oredigger]: According to outside sources, you may qualify as a geek. Do you think that this is correct?
[Hansen]: Yes? Why else would you be talking to me? Plus if you go to Mines it is safe to bet that 9 out of 10 people you know are geeks. But what makes me a geek? Could it be my love of “Scrubs” or my extensive knowledge of movies and a secret love of musicals? Maybe it is the fact that whenever I have a chance, I sing every moment of Bohemian Rhapsody. I don’t know, maybe it is one of these things or one of the many other geeky qualities I sorta hide – or sometimes flaunt – from the world.
Some might say, based on your photo shoot, that Hobo is a better description… What do you have to say to that?
Screw you! It’s hard living on the streets…. I’ve heard. But seriously, it is winter time and I am really lazy. I can’t help but to wear old sweaters and not shave. Still, I guess if I saw me on the street I’d think, that guy needs a warm bowl of soup and a job.
So, according to your sign, you will work (you spelled work wrong, by the way) for beer, sex, or a degree… Which of these things would you work hardest for?
Sex, definitely sex… The other two are just so easy to get.
What is your geekiest habit, or habits, in the unlikely event that you have several…?
Hmmm, habit? It might have to be turning everything into math or some kind of solvable problem. Like when I am driving on a curvy round I wonder what is the centripetal force acting on my car? Or how fast would I have to be going to cause my tires to slip and what would be the coefficient of friction between my tires and the road?
So why did you choose Mines as the school at which you could express your inner geekdom?
For all the ladies of course! That and I love math and science and girls…. Wait…
So, how do you define “free time” and when you have it, what do you do with it?
Well this is the first semester that I’ve had free time and I am finally starting to remember what it is like. I Pretty much spend it working out then playing video games until I find something fun to do, or until I get distracted by stumbling on the Internet learning random facts about random things. I used to really like reading Greek mythology, but I ran out of stories… sad day. Man, my free time seems so awesome when I talk about it out loud.
So, Who is your favorite power ranger?
White Ranger of course! Also, I’d like to point out that all the new Power Rangers are whimps compared to the old school ones.
What is the GEEKIEST thing you’ve seen happen at Mines so far?
There are so many things, but off the top of my head I come up with… At one of my first Mines parties there was a guy in the corner doing Calc 3 homework between beer pong games. I thought he was a total nerd then… but I have learned the value of mixing drinking and homework. Then there was the time I went to a party, and I missed the part where it was a LAN party. Such a great night of DotA and Starcraft…. I mean what? Finally it might have to be a night combining all three. A night of homework, drinking, and World of Warcraft. I won’t reveal names.
Apart from being a role model for those less worthy to be bestowed the title of geek, what are your other hobbies?
Lifting, I go five times a week with my buddy Nolan. Hanging out with Nolan, can that be a hobby? Cooking, I love to cook! Especially deserts. My specialties are chocolate covered truffles. Do I really have time for many other hobbies? I guess movies, if you count sitting and watching movies.
So if you could have one superpower, what would it be?
Time travel. Hands down, time travel.
Why that power?
Seriously? Do we need to list the unlimited possibilties that would make me want to use time travel? The only other reasonable alternative would be Jedi powers; which is only better if you get a lightsaber.
How did you choose your major?
Because of Elaine. I was looking for a new major and after one talk with her she made MME sound like the greatest major, which it is! Seriously, if anyone ever has any doubt just go talk to her in the office of Hill Hall, you will be converted.
What made MME so much better than Chem E?
Lots of things. Like the fact that we get to make and break things. We get to avoid classes that turn out to be useless for our major. And, we are happy a majority of the time.
What is your dream life after you get out of Mines?
Finding a beautiful rich woman and traveling the world while we both only have to work when we feel like it. Might have a dog with me, cause dogs rule?
Do you have any vices that the world should know about? What would a person have to give you to win over your heart?
None that YOU should know about. They are for me to know and for others to figure out later at an undisclosed date.
Do you have any advice for aspiring geeks?
Let the geek flag fly! Seriously, if you can’t have fun being geeky here then where can you? But don’t let being geeky make you afraid of being cool; you can be a geek and still be cool.