Marquez Hall to be site of Breaking Dawn: Part 2

Summit Entertainment announced last week that it would begin filming the fifth movie of the Twilight saga right here on the Colorado School of Mines campus. Summit, the production house responsible for the Twilight franchise, spent the last two years scouting various college campuses across the country to find the perfect one for the fifth installment of the wildly popular teen vampire drama films.

The Twilight series has grown by leaps and bounds since diversifying its target audience to include college age girls at engineering schools. Their next move is to film the second part of Breaking Dawn on a college campus, in an attempt to further deepen that inner longing of college girls to swoon over the white-faced, sparkly vampire known as Edward. Cowlong Doon, the director of marketing for the film series, offered an explanation for why Summit chose the Colorado School of Mines campus, and specifically the brand-new Marquez Hall for the new film. “We’re concerned that the original target audience for the Twilight series (both books and movies) is getting too wise to be seduced by the frail plot and unconvincing love stories in the books. When we were thinking about how to attract a new audience, we realized that engineers tend towards slap-happy, retarded movies more than most. We’re unsure of why this is, but the research is there to prove that it happens.”

Marquez Hall “provided the perfect backdrop for the movie, simply because we had no need of extras. We could film the entire movie in and around the building, and the Petroleum students look enough like vampires and zombies that we let them wander through the set.” Doon pointed out that they did not even need to provide makeup for the Petroleum majors, because they all seemed to have this deathly pallor about them anyway.

Summit has not released an official timeline for the filming, but insiders have let on that it will most likely happen sometime around finals, when the students look the most dead. The Associate Dean of Students has issued a statement notifying the student body that Summit will be on campus scouting locations and camera angles, and has requested that all students be mindful of crews working on and around Marquez.

Twilight fans at the Colorado School of Mines may audition for supporting roles in the film, and have been instructed by Summit to submit a short resume and a video of themselves performing part of one of the movies to their Trollsville, CA office by the end of September.

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