Field Guide to Mines Students

Freshman orientation has come and gone, classes have started, and students seem to be getting the hang of things. CSM lovingly provides their fresh victims with some preparation, and the campus maps do well to let new students know where they will spend their mornings and afternoons. Yet something has been missing. In order to truly navigate the Mines campus, one must be able to navigate its inhabitants. Therefore, a never-been-seen-before Field Guide to Mines Students is being released to the CSM community.

Field Guide to Mines Students will contain compelling diagrams and sketches of the major species viewable from the streets of campus and major computer labs. It will also include a visual history of the evolution of the Mines student, from 1874 to the present day nerd.

One of the main components of the field guide broke students down to their majors, noting that the school’s environment and the respective environments of the academic departments both draw certain species of science-loving students and shape them as they continue in their studies. (The field guide includes a short-term, or 4-6 year morphology chart.)

The authors of Field Guide to Mines Students have agreed to reveal a small portion of the knowledge they have compiled before releasing the rights to the campus bookstore, which will charge $585.99 for the book.

Engineering physics majors, one of the lesser-seen majors walking out of doors, generally have bloodshot eyes from attempting to complete homework from the night before. They may also get confused with computer science majors, who also are nocturnal but for different reasons. The differentiating factor of physics majors from others is the presence of tie-dye in their wardrobe, but like the Chemical Engineering majors, they might be seen with groups of their classmates working through their load of homework.

Geology majors are also discernible by their wardrobe, but this outdoorsy brand of students is actually seen frequently outside wearing Chacos, a Hawaiian print shirt, and a box of coloring pencils in their back pocket. They may also be seen licking rocks from time to time. Their fellow geo-scientists, the geophysics majors, may also share some parallels with geology, but geophysics majors debatably wear more plaid. If students are squinting their eyes, it is likely that they are spending much of their time in the confines of Green Center.

Of the underground-prone students, Civils are one of the most likely to actually wear their hardhats after the freshman M-Climb. And of course, Mining majors have the most glorious beards.
Field Guide to Mines Students is a must-own book this Fall and will save students countless hours in the field trying to discern CSM students in their natural habitat.

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